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Leveraging the Universe
2 months ago
Though he has played this shot plenty of times, it has never been played by him to such a perfection, with the ball rocketing away from Jokovic, hitting a winner, which cemented his crucial triple match point at the US Open Semi-Finals. Also it has been very long time since we have seen such a kind of emotions from Roger.
Previous: Love & Wedlock
Love Forever
Entering this quadrant, you feel you're more responsible, having successfully registered in this society with approval from parents and other well-wishers.
All the previous quandrants combined span for max of approx 7ven years. But this quadrant spans around 7ven times of all the previous combined. So, its not as easy as it was like the previous quadrants. This is your every second life for billion and trillion seconds. And its really tough to get thru this. But i think the first 5ve years in this quadrant is the crucial time. Once you cross this period, you're well in the Safe and Happy zone. So, what makes this period very crucial??? this is the period, where there are more chances of you getting different in what you were thinking till now about your 'life-partner'. More this chance, more the chance of divorce, more the chance of sadness, more the chance of making people loose trust in love marriage. its just a avalanche effect you kno.
So, what makes this chance more possible? Well, this is the period, when you are really worried that honey is not bitter, moon does not have gravity, rain-drop is not colourful and firefly has not heat. All these things seems to be more important and vital to you now. You feel like without these, its very hard to go ahead, tho this is just an illusion.
Next is, the added factor of responsibilty. Its much worse than what you would have ever imagined. its like a big burden on your head. All these were not experienced in any of the previous quadrants. its will look like, you're are lost in some unexplored jungle. All this is because of the fast and faster world, which expects you to be in sync with it. So, just sit back and relax, then look at all those so called responsibilities. Understand the intention of those responsibilities. Now they wont seem like a burden, it'll be more pleasure in doing those and you would definitely enjoy it more that you have thought.
Also, you can notice few changes in your 'life-partner"s mentality/behaviour/concerns (both man and woman). this may be very shocking for the other person. just for example: in the other quadrants, the guy might have taken care of most of the girls needs like paying bills, calling her always (even in office), etc, etc (i know there are lot more needs than listed here). Once married, this suddenly turns out like the Woman has to take care of her Man (atleast in most cases). This is like total ridiculous for the woman, and a drastic change in Man. This initially start like a little crack in the bridge, followed by sudden difference in opinions, added factor of parents, mis-understandings, quarrels for even little things, which makes the crack bigger and bigger, finally ending up in bridge getting collapsed. So, just by megre understanding of the person and the changes which are likely to be there, and few aestheic 'adjustment's and few sweet 'sacrifice's (which are really needed in long run), All these differences could never ever survive between those two souls, and those cracks ,even if it appears, gets vanished just like that.
This makes Love Forever, ever and ever...
DD, i think the secret for your "after 30 years" wish is revealed now. Enjoy and have fun always.
Disclaimer: Anything which has hurt you or affected you, i have np with that, until it hurts me... just kidding. just ignore whatever you dont like in this 360 degree. All these are purely/just my opinions. Have fun and be happy always, which is what i want from and wish anyone who read this.
-The End-
Previous: In Love
Love & Wedlock
Those who manage to build the bridge stronger or manage to successfully walk through the thin rope, end-up here. This is the quadrant, where you want to register yourself in the world. This is the world which is not considered till now, which mostly comprises of parents, friends, very close relatives.
Now you try to change the thing that, " 'You're in love with so & so person" is till now known only to very very close friends" (that's how most people think. but the reality may be otherwise). There is always this confusion of when to tell parents about this. If parents are very much ok for love, then no problem at all. what if otherwise? when there was some discussion about this topic, one of my good friend told that, 'you tell parents, when you think that you're ready to get married'. By this way, you can enjoy all those 'in love' part more, take this out when you think about marriage and ready for wedding. And this seems quite practical too (i think you're aware that, we're just talking about 'when to tell your parents'. not 'when to get married'. 'When to get married?', its absolutely depends on person and situation). Once you're ready, get this to parents, convince them as this is the right thing to do, its hard to do that, but with little struggle, more talk, it is possible (in most cases). This is the hard part, which you always like to take it only at the end or try to postpone it to the max extent you can.
Just try to put in "Parent" shoe, and think for a while. " You have been taking care of your child, working and living all these years, just bring your child up to a better position. You always think that your child should get all the things, which he/she wants, and you try to make your child's life happy and better always. And when you come to know that, your child is in love with 'someone' (till now he/she is still just someone for them), for these many years, and you were not aware of it. Isn't it odd for you. don't you feel bad about that (bad here, not for the love, for not knowing/saying it till now) ". So, if there is any person in this world, who deserves to be told about this, i would really say, its none other than parents. And this bad feeling runs till their life ends, and i think, is the main reason for parents to not accept your love at the first point. though you can convince them on any other reason which they say for not accepting, this bad feeling will haunt them always, ever after.
Talking about the reasons, what other reason does parents say for not accepting? I just want to take little help from Vijesh here, in quoting the points discussed in one of tamil debate show ( i too watched the show buddy. that dark guy was talking all rubbish stuffs only, like goin to the extreme extent) :
- Caste the guy or girl belongs
- Religion
- Language they speak
- Pride they might lose of accepting the love marriage
- I don trust love marriage
When your parents say these points, they just keep the 'society' in mind, before any other thing. Caz, once married, you are also part of the same society, which everyone belongs to. So, they always think on those terms. Its not that they dont bother about your happiness. As for them, they always think, you'll be more happy if you get along with the society, in the way the society wants, which is how they have been all these years. Any deviation from that, they think you're not going to get the help from the society. (By Society, its always or mostly, is your relatives). Though they are not that important in your point now, you might require them sometime. There are traditions that has been followed by this society for all these decades. The society is, how the people in that society are. so, people in parents generation, always abide by the laws of the society, which is that tradition. You can see a big difference between parents generation and their previous generations, all moving inch closer towards accepting these love marriages. And you can also see the difference between parents generation and current generation, where most people are accepting love marriages. the trend is really changing. but just because of the fact and moral that, you respect your previous generation, this tradition/relegion/caste/pride affects the marriage proposal. I'm very sure that, when we're the elder generation, this will get transformed totally (hopefully).
And about the dont trust part, its all what they see and hear from the society that, most love marriages gets over sooner than that apear, which is very true these days. Even you will accept that most divorce cases in court today are love marriages. Its just the fear that, their child also should not end up like this, losing happiness. I agree,that none can guarantee for happy life if its not love marriage. but what heard and seen in close circles, do affect our thinking more.
Here too, you always tend to disclose only those sweetness, glow, chillness and light about your lover to the parents. But, always try to disclose other things too, which might be a major concern later, like no gravity in moon. Your parents might thing of building palace in moon, which is not that easy as they think. It becomes your responsibilty to make sure that, either your parents are aware that its not easy or they dont think of building it in moon at all. :)
Looks like me more biased towards parents??? my answer would be, kind-of yes (will you oppose that?). But after all, what they want is our happiness. so, when you talk to them, be forward compatible, tell them in a way that they get your point crystal clear, assure them that you'll be really happy with this guy/girl, they will finally give the green signal (its personally up to each person on how to react if its Red Signal for sure). Once its Green from your parents, now, you dont have to bother about anyother person (ofcourse, the same applies to your lover too). Next are those days, counting every minute for that Moment, for your wedding. It does not depend on how crowded your marriage is, it surely depends on how happy people are in your wedding, even if the crowd is fewer.
And about the dont trust part, its all what they see and hear from the society that, most love marriages gets over sooner than that apear, which is very true these days. Even you will accept that most divorce cases in court today are love marriages. Its just the fear that, their child also should not end up like this, losing happiness. I agree,that none can guarantee for happy life if its not love marriage. but what heard and seen in close circles, do affect our thinking more.
Here too, you always tend to disclose only those sweetness, glow, chillness and light about your lover to the parents. But, always try to disclose other things too, which might be a major concern later, like no gravity in moon. Your parents might thing of building palace in moon, which is not that easy as they think. It becomes your responsibilty to make sure that, either your parents are aware that its not easy or they dont think of building it in moon at all. :)
Looks like me more biased towards parents??? my answer would be, kind-of yes (will you oppose that?). But after all, what they want is our happiness. so, when you talk to them, be forward compatible, tell them in a way that they get your point crystal clear, assure them that you'll be really happy with this guy/girl, they will finally give the green signal (its personally up to each person on how to react if its Red Signal for sure). Once its Green from your parents, now, you dont have to bother about anyother person (ofcourse, the same applies to your lover too). Next are those days, counting every minute for that Moment, for your wedding. It does not depend on how crowded your marriage is, it surely depends on how happy people are in your wedding, even if the crowd is fewer.
Next: Love Forever
Previous: The Love
In Love
This is the second stage, where you're very successful in your attempt. You'll be very happy person now, in cloud nine.
Yes. you're in cloud nine now, but walking in a bridge between more happiness and sadness. More wider the bridge is, more comfortable you are and thereby more happiness. But this width of the bridge is often affected and is prone to get reduced by various factors. Most cases, this width is so small that, its more like walking in a thin rope. The main reason behind the shrinking of the width of the bridge, which i think is, not understanding the other person properly. Now is the time to understand the person (tho you might have already known about the person, it may be just a small piece in the cake) thoroughly, completely, in & out. And i believe that's the reason people spend hours and hours in the initial days, trying to understand the other person to the core. When talking about the 'initial days', these are the days when you don't bother to notice the world around you, rather, you think your lover is The world for you.
And in these initial days, 'mostly', you tend to show only how good you are or only the good part of you, just like sweetness, glow, etc. this is very natural thing to do, caz that's what we were doing till this point in life. on the other side, you as the reciever, you're the one who has to explore and understand the 'not-so good' things about your lover (its always applicable to both boy and girl). At this stage, these 'not-so good' things ( i believe u agree that everyone has this thing for sure. but ofcourse, the extent of 'not-so' varies with person) is not considered or rather, not given much importance, and accept the other person as they are. Always try to accept people, for who and how they are. There are chances of the bridge getting broken, when the other person tries to convert, 'change' is the appropriate word, change him/her. This is the most dangerous part, if at all you really dont have any other choice than to change him/her, do handle it with atmost care. this trying to change, if not handled properly, leads to the dead end. is either because, the 'not-so good' part has really turned into 'bad' or mis-understanding. either way, once the bridge is broken, its hard, really hard, to repair. Its hard to repair, not just the bridge, even yourself too. Also, as Raggi's words (again :) ), make sure you give all the space and freedom for the other person, to be what and how he/she was till now.
This is the quadrant, where you anlayze and accept that, honey have only very little bitterness, moon has little little gravity, rain-drop has invisible colour and firefly does not have heat at all. Most wont analyze it properly or anlyze it correctly and everyting seems to be very much ok for them and accept it how it is, and allow it to remain the same way as it is. this is the most important part to be noted in this quadrant.
And also should always consider one thing, you're 'in love', so, its better to keep off 'making love'. for only those who're asking, why should i keep off, just think of your parents, thier trust in you, which is THE main thing. other factors include, culture, tradition, etc, etc (and varies on geography and the society. why should you be cared about society? the answer is on the way. you'll get it in-details little more words after. :) ). Even if you dont care about these, this is the stage where anything can happen, and where most breaks happen. There are ofcourse valid reasons for the breaking away. it depends on What you give the importance for. For example, i damn give importance to TRUST, more than anything. so, if i have to decide on breaking away, this trust will be the only consideration, honestly. Though breaking away affects you very much, its very difficult, rather impossible or not appropriate to break away once you 'make love'. whatever it is, if by any minute chance that you break away, i always say one thing only, 'Afterall, Life Has To Go On, Whatever.'
All these things apart, the most important thing, you enjoy the ecstasy of life in this quadrant. You feel very happy, when you know there is one more person, who cares for you in every bit of you, with whom you can share anything and everything, with whom you show how much care you take for him/her, and you know that you're really comfortable and safe (safe part - dedicated to girls ;) ) in this world with that person. You can share your everyday life, rather every second of your life with him/her (technology really plays an important role here). Your world is now full of joy, beautiful romance, the love shown at every second when you are with your lover, going out with him/her, all amazing feelings hidden for these many years, now unveiled. Its so much fun to be 'In Love'.
Next: Love & Wedlock
Love Is Like
The sweetness in the honey, not the bitterness
The glow in the moon, not the gravity
The purity of the rain-drop, not the color
The light from the firefly, not the heat
The sweetness in the honey, not the bitterness
The glow in the moon, not the gravity
The purity of the rain-drop, not the color
The light from the firefly, not the heat
These days i come across many of my friend's blogs or discussions, which has one common topic discussed, Love, but in various scenarios, various time in life, and different views. Just thought i'll also pen down few of my thoughts about those posts, and my opinion in general about this, Love - An One Word Epic.
I have split this 360 degree into four quadrants. You'll get to know about each quadrant, as you read along.
The Love
This is the first quadrant and i call this as "Magic" quadrant.
Let me try to get some excerpt from my post long back (didnt want to type it again ;) lazy u kno)... here are few...
"First, if you think you Love someone, never wait for your turn or never wait for chance or never have second-thoughts to tell the other person that you love him/her so much. Even if you know that it'll surely get rejected, never hold back, just express what you feel,. Express yourself."
Expressing is fine, but how should we know that we're in Love... here are my little thoughts... "Without any research, without any background verification, without analyzing the likes nd dislikes of each other, without comparing where we're aligned and where we're not, without any hesitation, just kept her in mind, as a part of my life, for a second and it was that moment, The Moment, which i felt, like million butterflies flapping its wings, like million stars sparkling, like million flowers blossoming, like million rain-drops falling in dry land, in my heart. You know what, this what i feel and call it as 'Love'.". If not sooo poetic, at-least you'll feel the unknown happiness, more comfortable, all these which cant be explained, all these which seems unusual to you. I think that's what 'Love' is.
Also, "Love is there in Heart,... It has no connection with Brain, which does the analysis part. Love is purely about how you feel from Heart. Its purely emotional. Its always the Feeling which decides whether you're in Love with a person or not. Only after that, you struggle (in most of the cases, but the trend is changing) to make it practical. When you give importance to both practical and emotional at the same level (when deciding/accepting/proposing), you should never ever claim you're in Love."
This is the stage, where you always see only the sweetness in the honey, glow in the moon, purity of the rain-drop and light from the firefly.
So, what if your proposal gets rejected? "i strongly think that 'True Love' has nothing to do with the number/times. At the same time, you cant say that you have 'True Love' with many people, caz, as i said, its always like falling into the deep water.". In, my friend, Raggi's words, "Love is not like ONCE IN A LIFETIME OFFER". You really feel very happy, when the number of attempts is very less, and in the exosphere, if thats One.
The one point which i dont agree with Raggi is "even if they already have an affair with someone els". I dont think there is any point in expressing what you feel about them, when they already have an affair. In-turn, it might inadvertently affect the peaceful mind of that person. He/She might now be worried about your failure, if you're good friend of them, and there might be a gap starting to emerge. I dont think anyone will wish for such kind of situation to arise, having known the other person well. So, we need to consider this as, just another attempt, and look forward for the next.
Whatever the case is, if your attempt didnt succeed, never mind. dont get into the sadness, dont hurt yourself more (caz you're already hurt now), dont worry. Just try to get out of it, as early as possible. Focus on other stuffs (hobbies, interests, anything...), which makes you not to think of that again. Analyse yourself, if you get any valid reason for your little step-back, try to ensure that, you're better from now. Afterall, Life Has To Go On, Whatever.
Next: In Love
Few very interesting, but TRUE, words i read today, in my horoscope....
" There is no guidebook that shows you specific steps to bridge the gap between you and anyone else, so you'll have to take a risk. Instead of opening the discussion with a know-it-all attitude, just admit that you don't have all the answers and are willing to listen now. "
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